So you’ve decided you want to become an exchange student! Maybe your parents are fully supportive and ready to help you make this a reality…great! Or maybe your situation is not so ideal. Do your parents think you’re dreaming an impossible dream?
You might consider first presenting them with all of the basics for parents. An AFSer named Kendra compiled an (amazingly thorough) 10 page packet that helped convince her parents she was ready for a study abroad experience.
Here’s what Kendra presented to her parents:
• A heartfelt letter introducing the idea of study abroad:
“Dear Mom and Dad…I would like to participate in an AFS program. AFS is a highly respected exchange program that has been sending students like me abroad for 60 years. This program allows teenagers to live in another country and immerse themselves in the culture. I want to participate in one of their year-long programs departing this fall.
“Now, I realize that this is going to be a big step for me, but I feel that I am ready for this particular step. I have put a lot of thorough and hard work into my decision and the packet of information that lies before you.”
• A list of pros and cons (and solutions for the cons):
Pros: “I’ll come back fluent in a second language”, “This is a big challenge but I know I can do it and I’ll become more independent and mature in the process.” and “You will save on 22 months of car insurance since I won’t be getting my driver’s license until I come back home next year.”
Con: “I will miss 1 year of school here in the US. However, I’ll be going to high school in my host country and it might be possible for me to get academic credit for my study abroad. I already have a meeting scheduled with my school’s guidance counselor I would love for you to come. She is very optimistic that we will be able to work something out.”
• Cost to stay in the USA for one year vs. cost to go abroad
“I have come up with a basic list of every thing that I spend money on in 1 year. I know that this list is just a good guess at the prices. I believe that this is an accurate expense chart, but I am open to your suggestions.”
Kendra totaled up the amount of money her parents spent on one year of school (lunches, sports, fees), clothing, entertainment, food, utilities, personal items, etc. She then compared this to the cost of an AFS program for a year.
Just as an example, USA Today estimates that the average yearly expense for a teenager in the US is nearly $11,000. Compare that to an AFS program (for which you might be able to get financial aid or scholarships) and AFS becomes a great value.
• Her fundraising plan
Kendra then gave an estimate of how much she expects to contribute to the cost of her AFS program and how she plans to raise the money. (Need ideas? We have tips to help you fundraise)
“As you know I have already applied for a job at a couple of places. Once I get one I intend to keep it until the time I leave. The money I earn could go towards spending money and for paying for some of the trip. You and mom could decide what I should put the money towards.”
• What AFS has to say about Thailand (or any other host country):
Kendra included a printout of the host country and program description for her host country.
• What the U.S. Government has to say about Thailand:
Kendra also included a copy of the Consular Information Sheet about Thailand provided by the U.S. Government.
• A colorful map of Thailand
An AFSer to Panama named Elizabeth gives this advice:
“You might try letting your parents talk to the parents of someone else who is currently or has previously gone on an exchange program with AFS. You can work with AFS to get in contact with some parents of exchange students if there aren’t any in your area. That way your parents can talk out their worries with someone who has been in a similar situation as them. They can get all their worries, concerns, questions…out on the table and hopefully the parents they talk to can smooth out some of their concerns.”
Another AFSer named Kristen posted this on our bulletin board:
“Here’s my advice: Have you submitted the pre-app? If you send that in (with the $75 – from your own money), and take the initiative to fill out as much of the full app as possible, that will (hopefully) show your parents that you really are serious about AFS, considering you would have already paid money and gone to all the trouble of filling out a good hunk of the application. I would also contact your local AFS volunteer (call the 1-800 number and AFS can tell you who she/he is) and arrange a meeting between you, your parents, and the volunteer. That way you’ll have someone ‘reliable’ to back you up, and your parents will again realize that you’re serious (at this meeting I would bring the semi-completed full-app so it can be discussed as well). Just try and be willing to listen to your parents, but show them how truly important this is to you.”